Disclaimer #1: If you’re easily grossed out, you probably shouldn’t read this.

Disclaimer #2: The only reason I put Disclaimer #1 up there was because I have readers from Holidailies popping in here and I don’t want anyone to freak out. Regular readers of my journal probably know by now that I sometimes post some weird shit that isn’t totally suitable for the kiddies.

Disclaimer #3: For the holidailies crowd, I didn’t want to put the “Adult” label on it because that seems to be the “This is a BDSM blog” label… and this blog sure as hell ain’t that.

Okay, on with the gross stuff:

I got called out yesterday evening to a signal 29–a death. The dispatcher advised me that it was a accidental death, and then advised me of the manner of accident. “Some guy got his head crushed by a FEMA trailer.” “Ew!” I replied.

I arrived on the scene to find several police cars, an ambulance, and a large area in front of a house that had been taped off with crime scene tape. In the driveway of the house was a FEMA trailer, with a Penske truck in front of it. I said Hi to the deputies on the scene, went back to my car to put my liner in my jacket because the temperature had dropped and it was getting Friggin’ Cold, then exchanged some more pleasantries with the deputies, since it was my old team and I’d known these guys for years. (They were all baffled as to why I was there since I normally do just the computer stuff. I had to explain to them this whole cross-training thing.)

“Yeah, whatever, Diana… get to the gross stuff!”

“Sheesh, fine.”

Okay, the gross stuff:

I went around to the other side of the trailer, and in the gap between the trailer and the penske truck was a man lying on the ground. Actually, I couldn’t see that it was a man at first because the MORONS WITH EMS HAD COVERED THE BODY UP WITH BLANKETS. Good God. Some people watch too much TV. You never cover the body up before it’s been processed, because you effectively destroy any trace evidence on the body when you do so. Fortunately, the coroner on the scene had a “meeting of minds” with the EMS guys and ’splained how things were done over here. It didn’t make a difference so much in this case since it was clearly accidental, but it’s still just a Bad thing to do.
Those readers of this journal who are writers, if you’re trying to be realistic, please don’t cover up your bodies. Er… in your fiction, I mean.

“Ahem… the gross stuff?”

“Oh… yeah… all right.”

I went ahead and took the scene pictures, and then the pictures of the body still covered up–documenting it exactly as it was when I got to the scene. One thing the blanket didn’t cover was the large viscous pool of congealing blood that was spread out beyond the victim’s head. There were several irregular lumps in the pool–whitish-grey lumps that looked like clots of soured milk, then some hard jagged clumps. Wasn’t too hard to figure out what those were. Then we pulled the blanket back to expose his head and face. There was a significant dent in the side of his face and head, and a large mass of blood and lump matter coming out of his nostrils. Congealed blood also was pooled around both ears, and the entire shape of his skull was oddly misshapen. His skin was white and doughy-looking, and his eyes were closed. It wasn’t hard to figure out that when the back end of the truck had come down on the guy’s head, it had essentially squished his brains out of the top and back of his head, as well as out his nose and ears. (Actually, it might not have been brains coming out of his nose, but that’s what my first impression was.) He’d been down for only about an hour by the time I started taking pictures, so his skin didn’t have the strange waxy quality that occurs after all the blood has settled, however it was cold enough that it was still pale and somewhat yellowed.

What seems to have happened was that this guy and his partners were delivering a FEMA trailer to this lucky family. However, when they attempted to get it unhooked from the hitch on the truck it got stuck. Well, this guy decided to lie under the back of the truck (which was very heavily loaded with conrete blocks and other equipment) and bang on the hitch with a hammer to get it unstuck. Well, it came unstuck, and when it did it came down.

Herein ends the gross portion of today’s entry.

So, of course I feel sorry for the family of the victim… but man, do I ever feel sorry for the people who were planning on living in that FEMA trailer! Gah!

Anyway, that was last night’s call. I got home cold and tired and went straight to bed.

At 2am my phone rang. “God hates me,” I said. 20 minutes later I was once again freezing my ass off in a parking lot where someone had decided to burglarize several vehicles. Fortunately, I’d had a moment of sheer brilliance and had put running tights on under my BDU pants. Unfortunately, my moment of sheer brilliance was not really a moment after all and more like 12 seconds, because I did not put on a long sleeved shirt under my uniform shirt, nor did I bring a hat along. When I got out to the parking lot it was Cold. And Windy. Did I mention Cold? Holy Fuck, it was cold. Wind chill was in the low 20s, and yes, to you Northern Types I am sure you are chortling into your hot chocolates right now, but I am most assuredly a Southern Girl, and I deeply fucking hate being cold.

By the time I got home I was frozen, exhausted, and it was only half an hour until my normal wake-up time. I took a blazingly hot shower to try to warm up and wake up, and then did my usual morning routine of getting the rest of my family up and out the door.

Only good thing is that my paycheck is going to be sweeeeeeeeeeeeet.