One of the biggest aggravations about having a house for sale is that it has to be in Pristine condition every single solitary time you leave the house. Which means that mornings that are already stretched thin and hectic become even more so when you have to factor in time for making sure all dishes are out of the sink and all laundry is out of sight and all floors are clean and all surfaces are wiped down and all toilets are flushed (yeesh) and all lights are on and all blinds are open and all beds are made… GAH!

This is in addition to making sure that kid is dressed and kid has pottied and kid drank all her milk and kid’s teeth are brushed and kid’s hair is brushed and kid’s bag is packed with the correct gear needed for that day at school (Dance day? Swim day?)

This morning I did my usual run-around-the-house making sure all was neat and tidy and pristine, and on my way out I noted that there was some grass that had been tracked into the kitchen. I scowled at the grass, and thought about the fact that the frickin’ broom was upstairs (I swear I will NEVER buy a 2-story house again if I can at all help it,) and then I scowled at the Sign-In sheet that realtors are supposed to use when the house is shown–the Sign-In sheet that has no frickin’ names on it at all so far, and I decided: Screw it. It’s not like anyone is beating our door down to see the place, and besides if I don’t sweep it, that will guarantee that someone will come to look at it today.

I just got a call from my realtor asking if it was all right if someone went to look at the house today.



I called my husband and said, “Hey! My evil plan worked!”

His reply: “Which one?”


Of course now I’m sitting here obsessing as to whether I did make sure all the toilets were flushed (Hey, I have a 3-year old!)